Ask Carolyn

  • Can you hear me now?

    Can you hear me now?

    Dear Carolyn: My mom is a very independent and active 72. Nonetheless, she is 72, and I worry sometimes, since she’s on her own. When she’s home, she has people around who she sees regularly; however, she’s currently on an extended vacation in another state where she knows no one. She has a cell phone,

  • Adoption option triggers bias

    Adoption option triggers bias

    Dear Carolyn: My husband and I are both in our late 20s and have decided to start a family through adoption. A childhood illness left me unable to have biological children. My husband knew this before we ever started dating, and his parents have known for years as well. No one — until now —

  • Dad feels left out

    Dad feels left out

    Dear Carolyn: I have the privilege of being a stay-at-home mom to our 6-year-old twins. My husband works full time and is out of town once a week. I think we have a good relationship. However, this is a constant issue: My husband would like to be included in our activities — going to the

  • Who’s your daddy?

    Who’s your daddy?

    Dear Carolyn: My mother says she will not tell me who my father is and will take the secret to the grave with her. Is there ever any good reason for not telling someone who their father is? — D. If she doesn’t know for sure herself. If he committed crimes so heinous that she

  • Your place or mine?

    Your place or mine?

    Dear Carolyn: My boyfriend and I have been dating for nine months, long-distance. We met in college seven years ago, were acquaintances, and just recently reconnected last year. We’ve started talking about the future, but can’t nail down what to do about where our future will be. He has a successful career in his city,

  • Jeez Mom, give it a rest

    Jeez Mom, give it a rest

    Dear Carolyn: My son knows that a card says a lot. Last year, my Mother’s Day card was just basic from my son, grandkids and daughter-in-law. I didn’t say anything. This year my grandson is 5 and he made a card, which was thoughtful but not from my son. Now reread the first sentence. I

  • Control freak? Who, me?

    My wife and I live by two different schools of thought. I believe that if something is worth doing, it’s worth doing right, and I put lots of time, energy and resources into things I plan. My wife believes the perfect is the enemy of the good, and will accomplish tasks in a way I